Tuesday, April 18, 2006

I must go down to the sea again...

“The Bank Holiday” is a great English tradition. Generations of children have been packed into cars, buried alive under the great mounds of household flotsam and jetsam deemed necessary to spend a few days in the country and driven, groaning and complaining all the way, at interminably slow speed along overloaded highways, to some damp destination that their parents think is ‘interesting’.

Not to be outdone I threw my ‘children’ into the car along with the tent and camping paraphernalia and drove for six hours to the coast. They deserve it you see, they’re dogs, they shouldn’t be cooped up indoors, no, they should be cooped up in the back of the car. So many, many hours after we set out we, found our pitch. It’s just as well really as I had absolutely no view out of the rear screen by then as they’d rimed it with half an inch of dog’s nose splufter. I’m glad we were in a field, I don’t think we smelt very nice.

So, all in all we’ve had a refreshing few days beach coming, reading, cooking bizarre meals on the primus stove and drinking lots of local beer with local people with one big eye in the middle of their forehead, (“Oo aar, av’ you met moi sister-wife?”).

Charlie’s little plastic bonnet came off so he could play on the beach. It was a practical measure as he was doing a good impersonation of a bucket dredger. I’ll offer you one piece of advice if I may, never throw a tennis ball in to the sea for your spaniel, if your terrier is wearing a plastic bucket on his head. The results might look hilarious but I’m pretty sure it’s less funny to your dog who is currently doing a head stand in a foot of salt water. Ah well, you live and learn?

On the Charlie front, we’ve discussed a few options with the vet. One is to surgically pull down a membrane from inside his eye lid and effectively sew his eye shut to give the cornea a chance to heal. The other, less palatable option is simply to remove the eye. But they’ll have to fight me for it – at least convince me that it is absolutely the best thing for him, because I’m going to kick up a hell of a fucking stink (excuse my French) before I let that happen.

For my part, well I’m fine. It’s nothing I need worry about any longer.

It was a pretty unpleasant experience though, conducted under local anaesthetic. It’s a very peculiar feeling, chatting to the nurse while some other faceless creature hacks away (I’m sure I do him a disservice by describing the surgeon’s handiwork as “hacking”, he certainly did neat stitches) at your bits.

And it must be a good sign that I’ve started to pick at the stitches?

Do you think that if I pull the wrong one the whole bloody mission will fall apart and I’ll lose the other two?


28 comments:

Wendy said...

I'm so glad you're back and all is well! My daughter calls the dog schnoog on the car windows "Dog Nose Grease". Gotta love it. Hey, that impersonation you had going there, of the one eyed guy -- sounds JUST LIKE my husband's Irish side of the family! Glad all is well Fish. Missed ya!

Shephard said...

Very glad all is well. :)
~S

Jessica said...

Love the photo, Colin!

Unknown said...

Now that is a great photo. Wish I was there too! Hmmm the smell of the sea air and sea hair!

Kelli said...

Looks like you and your kids had a fabulous time! Im glad that things are going well for you..very glad. :)

Melissa said...

Please don't fall apart before Friday, Col.

Unknown said...

Hmm. You know I should've posted this before. Max had to have an enucleation of his left eye because he had a benign tumor in it and basically had been blind in it for awhile. He did adjust, although honestly, he had such little sight, but he must have had some because after the surgery he had to relearn the house and yard. Once he fell in the window well and then we covered it then. Bad parents. Anyway, eventually he became totally blind and again, he adjusted. I say, try to do the surgery first. But if not, he will manage with one eye. And quite well I would imagine. I clicked on the picture and they are so precious. When I was fourteen, I had a Cairn mix whose name was Puppy. I tried to call her Elizabeth but no one else would, so...Puppy she remained.
Keep us posted!
Pam

Blondie... said...

The bucket head in the water part made me laugh so hard...

AND

No picking at the stitches!! lol, I'd hate to read one day that you left all your business on your bathroom floor because you couldn't leave well enough alone. ;-) hehe

Happy Wednesday!

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

Looks like the kid had a good time!

And don't pick at the stitches...if the other two do fall out, scoop 'em up, put 'em on ice and get to the doc A.S.A.P. (but I suppose I really didn't need to tell you that, did I?) :)

Monogram Queen said...

Awwww darling picture of the boys Col! I don't blame you I would fight to keep the eye also.
Don't pick at the stitches either!
Ooh I wish you had a pic of the guy in the pub LOL I bet it was a, um, what do you english say? Corker?

Jenn said...

High risk, low reward regarding picking the stitches. Oh..and thanks for the tip about not putting a dog in the sea with the bucket collar on...funny mental image though.

Daisy said...

Hi Fish~ Glad to have you back to the land of Blog and know you are well. Glad to hear about your little get away with your "kids". I think I would fight to keep the eye too. Although I am sure if it is absolutely necessary for Charlie to "lose" the eye, he will adapt very well. And please, NO PICKING!!!

Anonymous said...

Glad to have you back. Them collars on dogs are so annoying aren't they? I think I still have scars from when Blaise wore one about 4 years ago!
STOP PICKING! You could be right!!!
But do fight for the eye. Take care boys.

Jay said...

I cannot count the times I have rejoiced that the lamp shade approach was nixed for humans. Seems kind of sad for dogs too, but they can be such persistent little buggers.

Keasty said...

Just came by thru wendy's blog. glad all's well in the old country. I'm an aussie wandering round nth america.... be careful... i'm coming to london with my small wheeled bike!!

Blondie... said...

Man Colin, Make some extra money!! hahaha They did!!

Minnesota Nice said...

What a sweet photo, dogs plus mud equal happy dogs.

Jessica said...

Colin,

I have returned from NYC - let me know when you make it back!

Katya Coldheart said...

i hate to think of the trouble bath time caused when you got home, they look like they had a good time though...

*hugs*

Miladysa said...

Dear me everyone seems to have been in the wars a bit!

Hope you are all feeling much better and pluckier!

Heaps of love winging its way towards you all!

Deadly Female said...

Glad you are okay, Fish xx

Helene said...

I think I am going to go bathe my dogs right now in your honor! lol

Picking stitches is fine but you should be sure the skin is moist or it will bleed... yuck... nasty mental image! lol

cheers!

Kate

Anonymous said...

Come back Col.

Bebe said...

Hi Colin! I dropped in for an update on Charlie, but found the wordboard bare. I hope you arrived home OK. You have given new meaning to the term, "limey"
I forgot to tell you that in the US, those doggy buckets are called Elizabethan collars. Stupid Americans.

Tamara said...

Love the pic....sounds like you had a great time.Glad to hear ya'll are back safely.Wow,wish I could travel like you do.How neat-o!!
I hear ya about the vet stuff.Maybe you should get a 2nd opinion,just to make sure he really needs that surgery,ya know?
hugs....T.

Melissa said...

Col, write a new post, damnit.

Anonymous said...

I grew up by the seaside and Bank HOliday weekends were scary times for us.

Minnesota Nice said...

C'mon Col, we know you've got something interesting to say. You always do!